One of my very favorite movies is Blazing Saddles. And one of my very favorite scenes is when Hedley Lamarr’s henchman, Taggart, and his band of cut throats and ruffians encounter a bogus toll booth in the middle of the badlands on their way to destroy the town of Rock Ridge.
“The (Gov.) Le Petomane Thruway?” Taggart fumed as he read the inscription on the toll booth. “What’ll that *bleep* think of next?”
Well, with all due respect, I’m kind of feeling the same way about GM Ron Hextall. Let’s see. So far this summer we effectively lost not one, but two good players to Seattle in the expansion draft, including our emotional pulse and fire starter Brandon Tanev. We watched Cody Ceci (Edmonton) and Frederick Gaudreau (Minnesota) sign with other clubs. Okay, maybe not Hextall’s fault…he only has so much to work with, cap-wise, and they both received significant bumps in pay.
I can even live with bringing Evan Rodrigues back. He grew on me as the season progressed.
But signing Dominik Simon?
Not in the deepest, darkest recesses of my mind did I think for one second the Pens would bring back the checkered Czech forward. Especially given our stated desire to add size and sand.
Heck, I was so confident he’d never be black-and-gold property again I even teased Other Rick about it the other day. (Yes, you can blame me.)
Does Mike Sullivan have compromising photos of Hextall and Brian Burke as well as everyone else in the organization? He must. How else can you explain such a disastrous move.
I don’t mean to be harsh. But Simon had zero, zip, nada points in 11 games with Calgary this past season. Four shots on goal. Thirty-percent in the faceoff circle. A sparkling Corsi (his supposed strength) of 48.9. The very definition of a perimeter player.
Puh-lease. That’s $750,000 that could’ve been better spent elsewhere, two-way deal or not.
Even worse? You just know at the first hint of anything, Simon will be playing right wing on Sid’s line. I can hear Sully now. “We think Dom’s got some good skills.”
Yeah, and I got some swamp land in Florida I’ll sell to you cheap. It’s called the Everglades.
Penguins Sign McGinn
Okay, so Hextall did walk the dog back in…slightly…by signing free agent forward Brock McGinn to a four-year deal with an average annual value of $2.75 million.
The 27-year-old left wing plays an honest, aggressive game and is good on the penalty kill. Offensively, the former second-round pick of the Hurricanes topped out at 16 goals in 2017-18. This past season, he tallied eight goals and 13 points in 37 games.
Basically a replacement for Tanev.
There is a bonus with McGinn. Although he doesn’t drop the gloves all that often, he can fight, especially when compared to his new teammates. However, at 6’0” and 187 pounds, don’t expect him to take on the Tom Wilsons of the world.
All-in-all, a solid signing. But the Pens need more, especially in the size/toughness department.
Let’s hope Hextall delivers.
Lindberg Signs
Okay, make that two good moves for Hextall & Company. They signed hot goaltending prospect Filip Lindberg to a two-year entry deal today.
A former seventh-round pick of Minnesota who couldn’t come to terms with the Wild, Lindberg, 22, enjoyed spectacular collegiate success at UMass-Amherst. Over the past three seasons the 6’1″ 188-pounder’s posted a sparkling 1.58 goals against average and equally impressive .937 save percentage in 50 games, along with 11 shutouts.
A welcome addition to a team that’s more than a bit thin in the goaltending department. Especially with Maxime Lagace signing with Tampa Bay today.
Pens Add Depth Defender
The Pens capped the first day of free agency by signing veteran defenseman Taylor Fedun to a one-year, two-way deal worth $750,000. A right-hand shot, the 33-year-old blueliner has played in 127 NHL games for five teams, including Edmonton, Vancouver, San Jose, Buffalo and Dallas.
He’s expected to provide depth and veteran leadership for the Baby Pens, who lost Zach Trotman (retirement) and Kevin Czuczman (free agency).
Hey Rick,
I think I figured it out, or maybe narrowed it down a little.
A. Hextall really is trying to sabotage Pittsburgh. He never really did get over the Robbie Brown incident.
B. Hextall was thinking about me and wanted to give me ammo. He is Jonesing for more of my acerbic or in my case acidic wit.
C. Hextall is looking to give Sully enough rope to hang himself.
D. Hextall wants a top 5 pick in 2022.
E. All of the above!
Just saying.
Hey all,
Not to squirt gasoline on a dumpster fire that’s already burning out of control. But in his last 19 NHL games dating back to Valentine’s Day 2020, Dominik Simon has exactly zero points. Not even so much as a second assist. In fairness to him, he was probably nursing a shoulder injury for part of that stretch. But still, a goose egg is a goose egg, any way you cook it.
In a reflective moment, I see what Hextall was trying to do. He’s trying to fill Frederick Gaudreau’s spot on the cheap, and on the surface Simon and Freddy would seem to have similar skill sets. But looks can be deceiving. Gaudreau was what I call a “grimy” player, a guy who would roll up his sleeves, stick his nose in and get dirty. For a player of modest size, I thought he was surprisingly effective in traffic. And he could handle bottom-six duty while slotting in to the top six in a pinch.
Simon tries to be an “inside” player but isn’t. As I wrote in a previous comment, he isn’t effective in a bottom-six role. Which means he has to play top six or not at all.
Based on his lack of production, I vote for the latter.
Rick
Hey Rick,
Simon is an Oxygen thief end of story.
He doesn’t belong in the NHL at all. He is too small and soff’ to play bottom 6 and hasn’t the scoring ability to play top 6. His best games came against the UK and France in the World Cup, the international version of the little sisters of the poor and Helen Keller’s school for the blind when it comes to hockey.
If Simon even touches the ice anywhere other than Wheeling Hextall, Burke, and Sullivan need fired and Penguin ownership needs a psych eval for 302ing them if this team goes into the season as constructed today.
What was it that Robert Plant sang “Does anybody remember laughter?”
Well open your ears and you can hear it ringing out from DC to British Columbia as every city in the league is laughing their arses off.
Rick, The Other Rick
Maybe we’re jumping the gun on Simon. I heard rumors they’re bringing him back
as a human Zamboni. Makes sense I always thought he was laying on the ice more
than he was upright on his skates. I guess Hextall does have a plan.
Lol Mike,
I heard Simon makes mean ice-angels.
Maybe Sullivan told Hextall he Simon plays a heavy game.
I am very frustrated too, I just don’t get it. Maybe Sullivan has something over Ron and Brian, maybe Mario is kissing his butt and gives Sully what he wants. After such a good draft, I am disappointed after today.
Both Ron and Brian said we needed to get long in the pants, more sandpaper..
Now today we are smaller, we are going to basically have the same team, a little smaller, that was beat up by the Islanders and beat us out of the playoffs, I don’t get it.
I understand too that Ron had limited cap but he had the chance to make more room, via trade of Zucker and or Pettersen. Does Mario and his organization not see how the last three Stanley Cups have been won?
Nick Ritchie would have been a great addition, oh wait he is too big for our smurf team…sorry.
Again I just don’t get it.
My other thought today is, maybe Mario told Ron he wasn’t aloud to spend to the cap, Penguins are $3.6 million under right now.
Any other ideas fellow poopers??
Hey Pen’s4ever,
Cue the new Beach Boy’s tune “Smurf City Pittsburgh Pa”
I too understand that there is a Cap issue involved and that is doubly why the team can’t afford to throw any money at this pathetic bag of hockey trash [Simon]. If Sid was still the Sid of even 2015, maybe, just maybe Simon could be Brian Piccolo to Sid’s Gale Sayers, or actually more accurately Michael Moriarty could play Sid in the NHL version of Bang the Drum Slowly and Robert Dinero could play Simon, with just a slight plot twist. There is no sane argument for this idiocy!
As far as I am concerned Hextall already needs canned, send sullys clown ass with him, seriously. Where in the hell is this so called sandpaper???? I’m still waiting Hextall, where is it? Mcginn? Give me a break, a poor mans excuse for a Tanev if we’re all being real, at least its better then nothing but c’mon we’d all rather have tanev. Now we have about $3.5 million in cap left, which is basically for ZAR & Zohorna, so how are we getting a “big tough sAnDpApeR defensemen durr durr ” that’s how Hextall sounds in my head. the answer? when hell freezes over….that’s when.
then we get to “HIM” the name that haunts my dreams……..dominik (hockey sin) simon…….for the love of god, why, whyyyyyyyy, WHY?!?!?!?! For F$#! sake, why would Hextall bring back this fred flintstone lard of shit. my god I don’t even want to watch the season, I already know they’re planning on playing this garbage player, and I mean GARBAGEEE player, dude just played 11 games and didn’t register a single point, my god we’re reaching milan lucic levels of bad and he’s 7 years younger, so what’s his excuse? at least lucic can claim he’s aging or something, Simon can’t say anything, you know why? Because he belongs playing street hockey against toddlers, they’re all his size too he might stand a chance, might even register a point, honestly he’s so bad he might not even. I’m over it, my day is ruined…I’m going to go watch another team, I’m searching for a good rival to root for so I can cheer with joy as they just plaster the new team of pens by the love birds Hextall and sully, I heard they’re even changing the name to the Pittsburgh Fairy’s. I hope Santa brings a big fat load of coal and dumps it all over sully/hextalls living rooms
randomhockeylover,
I believe you sir summed up the entire Penguins fanbase sentiment in one comment, on top of that I think you’ve won an award for probably one of the funniest hockey comment rants I’ve ever had the pleasure of reading my friend haha!
I will say though, I don’t think Brock McGinn is a poor man’s excuse for Tanev, I think he possibly could be better, if he grows properly. But I also attribute that comment to your overall frustration haha
Cheers
As I said elsewhere Caleb The team doesn’t need McGinn anywhere near as bad as bite on Defense
The OTHER Rick
Your post must have been prior to us signing Fedun. We’re all set defensively. I
just threw up……”Sorry”
Yep, now Hextall is Fe Done with fixing the D.
Hey Randonhockeylover,
I feel your pain…I really do. When Other Rick first told me about the Simon signing, I thought he was joking. But no…
I think it’s a horrendous move…on so many levels. The last thing we needed was another perimeter Smurf forward. If he takes the spot of a younger/bigger/more promising player…truly shame on them. And Simon is virtually useless in the bottom six. Which means…you guessed it…a top-six role or bust. And given how much Sullivan and, inexplicably, Crosby love this guy…
Truly, my worst hockey nightmare come true.
The only thing that can remedy this for me is if Hextall signs Erik Gudbranson as our third right-side defenseman. I think it’s doable, $$$-wise, and it would at least give us some physicality (agree with your assessment of McGinn/Tanev). Not that it’s going to make us a Cup contender or even a playoff team. But at least we’ll have a little shove back.
Rick
PS–You might not want to read Rob Rossi’s coverage of the signing on “The Athletic.” He writes glowingly of Simon. Don’t know what he’s smoking, but maybe I should try it…
PSS–Haven’t heard boo from Brian Burke on any of this. Has he been fitted with a muzzle?
Hey Rick,
The worst part of this signing is that it signals to me that Sully is getting a vote of confidence in his Smurf motiff. After today, even if the team signs Gudbranson, the fact taht Hextall put Simon back in his tool box, Sully will never use Gudbranson or any other long pants hockey player.
randomhockeylover,
100% agree, after yesterdays performance it is time to fire both Hextall and Sullivan!
Hey Rick,
For me the 2021 Penguins will be NO better and I would argue worse than the 2020 version that failed so miserably in their stated goal of reaching the 3rd Round of the playoffs in order to achieve financial success.
It is laughable to think that this current group will ever make it to the finals again. 3 years in a row we were easily defeated and it was obvious then and remains today that the real culprit is Ownership. They live in a fantasy land where by Sid, Geno and Kris will always remain Penguins and some how magically we are going to become Cup Champions again. Stop living in the past and make the tough choices NOW !!
We have NO farm system,NO young elite talent, our Coaching is mediocre at best and the team can not play the physical game needed to win a cup.Defense,Goal tending, 5 on 5… We are no where near Cup caliber now. Plus we mismanaged the salary cap with bad trades and or over paying for questionable talent many times. So sad but true and now we are paying the price.
I am afraid we will continue to do the same by giving huge, high priced extensions to Geno and Kris extending our misery and pain another 5 years. Where does this end Rick ?
I said it last year, and the year before and I will say it again.In NHL Hockey there are two games being played at the same time.Each one is equally important..You need to win them both to have continued success. One game is played on the ice and the last 3 years we have been a total failure! The other game is the one played off the ice and in the back rooms with the other 31 teams. In that arena we have failed for at least the past 5 years as well. In 2021-2022 could be the season we fail to make the play offs and everyone will be so shocked… I don’t blame GM Hextall..He has no hockey pieces to work with and no Money to spend on elite free agents either. What can we expect ? We will not make the hard choices… Just being a realist Rick.
Cheers
Jim
Hey Jim,
Good to hear from you!!
Amen, Amen, Amen, This team is significantly less than last years team and last years team lost in the 1st round for the 3rd year in a row.
The Farm System is weak and you are right, it isn’t Hextall’s fault, that lies at the feet of JR as he has turned Pittsburgh into Carolina part deux.
I was so, so glad to see JR move on and was hopeful with Hextall, but he isn’t any better. Simon did not even finish the season last year in the NHL yet Hextall signed him. What? And then as Caleb noted Hextall thinks Simon will do any better this season?
I was hopeful that at some point down the road Hextall would dump this joke of a coach and move on, but he went out and signed Mr Softie because bozo Sully said so. Right now I feel like Mugatu from Zoolander, “I feel like I’m taking crazy pills.” Hextall has bought into the Sully Kool-Aid and we are stuck.
I hope Hextall, Burke, Mario et al like these long summers, they are on course for another pathetically long one.
My only hope is that with Simon back, maybe, just maybe idiot Sullivan will demote Guentzel to 2nd line with Malkin, where he should have been all along and give his illegitimate son Simon top line status. If this will be his last season, at least Malkin will be able to finish it with a bang in that scenario.
My shock at this travesty is now settling into a morbid depression!
Thanks Coach for the very kind words. It has been a rough go these past 2 years and I miss the old gang. We have had some fun times talking Pens Hockey these past 5 years and I want to thank Rick Buker for all the hard work and passion he has put into this site. Of course a special thanks go out to Phil, you, Pens Forever,55 on Point and all the others as well. Congratulations to Caleb as he starts to write for the PP gang. I am looking forward to reading his well researched pieces.
A flashback Coach… .Remember when McDavid was drafted by the Oiler’s and there was a piece in their LOCAL media suggesting the Oiler’s trade their First round pick for Geno ? I wonder what Pens fans would think today of having Conner McDavid leading the team and Sidney playing the number Two line as he approaches 34 years of age and has started to slow just a bit !! I think our franchise would be in a much better place….But no one ever had the guts to make a trade like that…
That is the kind of leadership the Pen’s are missing my friend.Just a thought Coach..
Cheers
Jim
Hey Jim
100% agree, the Penguins let sentimentality overrule their senses and they miss golden opportunities. There are players I really like, Murray was one of them but last season I was all for trading him for a draft pick to get Bloomqvist. Hockey is not just a sport but a business management needs to think what is best for the team.
Welp I’m going to take back a bit of what I said as Hextall just said the following
“Ron Hextall on Dominik Simon: “We got good reports. Sully and Patrik know him well. We just felt like we needed depth added up front, and think Dominik will be a real good piece for us moving forward.”
That’s a really worrying comment, it just seems like Sully is whispering in Hextall ear sweet nothings. So I would say that puts a more negative light in my eyes on Hextall, I really really don’t like that comment.
He also said “Hextall: It’s yet to be determined whether Simon will be in Pittsburgh or Wilkes-Barre/Scranton. We’ll see what training camp dictates. We’ve got some kids that’ll be fighting for some spots, and Dom will be in the mix.”
That sounds like PR/blarney talk for Hextall really saying:”Me and Sully are playing Simon on the main roster but we’re going to make it sound like he’s working for a spot because it sounds better” yikes, I will be really P***ed the F off if this clown takes a spot from Zahorna or possibly Legare.
Hey Caleb,
Last season, Rick B noted a video clip of JR and Sully talking about your boy Rodrigues and Sully saying that he was sure Rodrigues was going to score tons of goals for the Penguins last year (he did manage 7 – could have been worse, with a kick in 2 against Buf and 1 against NJD, but definitely not a ton). Your quote of Hextall’s is eerily similar.
Hey Rick,
Just like Fox Mulder, I want to believe, but Hextall is rapidly losing integrity in my book.
I don’t mind the McGinn signing, but but Simon and Rodrigues – that is beyond pathetic!!!!!!!!!!!!
What this team really needs is defensemen not more forwards. There is a boat load of untried but promising young players in WBS, players that deserve a chance far more than Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber.
A & E used the tag line time well spent, well Hextall, this was not money well spent!!!!!!!!!!
All of your Marshmallow clones will once again expose your Goalies.
They were the clones that pinched giving up goals to lose games 5 and 6 this year.
I am so glad you fixed that problem – yes, that is sarcasm in the extreme!
Go sign some more ice capade rejects for forwards while you talk about grit out of the other!
and I will sharpen my poisoned keyboard and laugh all the way to another long summer of I told you so s
Hey Other Rick,
Going to have to say that “I don’t mind the McGinn signing” is a bit of an understatement, Hextall got a young Tanev for about a million less than Tanev himself, on top of that he’s younger, and with a lot more upside especially with a team like the Penguins.
And I’ll dare you take the name of Rodrigues in vain haha! Yea I strongly disagree that Rodrigues is a bad signing especially at $1 million, I mean my god that’s barely over league minimum, I strongly disagree that he’s as you put “tweedle dumb/dumber” Rodrigues is 10x the player than Simon.
I would also like to throw in (though, I enjoy you and ricks rants lol) that I think you’re both jumping the gun a bit here, not all the moves have been made, the lines aren’t set and the season hasn’t started, let’s let the dust settle first before we judge lord Hextall. Everyone you’re ranting about signed dirt cheap, he also just made two really good signings in Mcginn & Lindberg, so let’s give him a little more time, we haven’t even seen if he looks to flip any of these players.
You may be right, this could turn out to be disaster, and nobody in our prospect pool gets a chance, and we got captain joe blow Simone playing next to Crosby.
Hey Caleb,
Sorry but I cannot agree. You are right, Rodrigues is 10x the player that Simon is but 10 x 0.01 only makes 0.1. Most importantly, the forward didn’t lose the playoffs for the Penguins, the defense did and there are assets among the forwards that could bring grit to the team but all there is up and down this organization among the defense is marshmallows. The only D-man that may have what the team needs is about 6 or 7 years away (Laatsch).
McGinn would not be a bad pick up, if the D was made up of the D-men that I mentioned would be on my team if I had been GM (Pedan, Hague, Oleksiak, Alexeyev, and Kaski). Now there may be no money to sign Zohorna (not all that worried about ZAR.
The Lindberg signing may be good – or not. He was draft 197, the last player drafted in 2019 but his body of work doesn’t look bad and he has already been in the states so he may not have to adjust like other goalies. Even though he is passing up 2 more years of College, he may not even get a chance to play in WBS. He may have to start in Wheeling.
More importantly at 22 he may not ever get a chance with Blomqvist and Clang in the org.
All Hextall has done is waste money.
Hey Other Rick,
There are just some tools you don’t want in Sullivan’s tool kit. And Dominik Simon is one of them.
You know if Sullivan has his way, Simon’s going to be taking ice time away from a younger (probably bigger) and more deserving player, be it Angello or Legare or Lafferty or Poulin or perhaps even Zohorna. That would be absolutely tragic.
Honestly, I don’t know how Hextall came to the unfortunate conclusion that we needed another 5’11” 190-pound perimeter player, rather than sticking to his stated plan to add size and toughness. It just boggles my mind. Does he really think Simon’s going to help us come playoff time, if we even make the playoffs?
Shame on him for listening to Sullivan on this one. He had to know his coach has a totally unreasoned bias toward this guy.
Grrrrr …
Rick
I am right there with you Rick,
Even if Simon goes down to WBS he will be taking time away from more deserving young kids in need of TOI to develop.
As I wrote, Hextall has lost a lot of cred on this one. This was an insane signing!
Hey Other Rick,
I think it’s time for your Simon statistical expose. Seriously …
Rick
Rick & The Other Rick
Disappointing day to say the least. We’re right back where we started, even with McGinn
replacing Tanev we’ve added nothing in terms of toughness and size. Where things stand
right now this team will not make the playoffs. Even if we’re lucky enough to sneak in it will
again be a quick exit.
Why is Hextall wasting money on E-Rod, Simon, and the Defenseman from Dallas? This is
beyond ridiculous. Theirs no way a Hockey person can look me in the eye and believe
this team has any shot at competing for another cup. We’re actually worse – our star players
are a year older. Same old, Same old. I’m in shock.
Amen Mike
The Other Rick & Rick
We’re getting our _sses kicked in Free Agency. We were already behind the 8-ball and everyone
seems to be improving their rosters but the Penguins. If the Penguins are so worried about
the salary cap then dump Letang, ZAR, and Pettersson. You’ll free up around 12 or 13mil. I want
to give Hextall the benefit of the doubt but “Come on”. Give me back JR at least he was trying
to make a difference even if he made a few poor decisions. Unless a miracle happens between
now and training camp the Pen’s are in serious trouble.
Saad to the Blues 5 years – 4.5mil per
Perry to the Lightning 2-year deal – money not disclosed
Still no Defenseman. I get the feeling Hextall is planning to slide Friedman into our top 6. I like
him but only for a depth player ( 7th or 8th). He’s going to blame it on Finances.
Hey Mike,
I am afraid you are right, it looks like Hextall has blinders on for Freidman. Simon will actually do damage to the offense, while Freidman could be serviceable as a 4th RHD but this team overvalues way too many players, like this.
Under the current Cap, ZAR had better not get more than $1.5 million. I wouldn’t have even tendered him a Qualifying offer. I am not as down on him as you and he is better than Simon but come on he plays 4th line and has not shown any flashes to rise much higher. It is time to move on.
I would love to at least dump Pettersson, but I am not seeing anything in Hextall to give me hope.
Letang, I would have loved to dump him long ago and then tried to use that money to make a run at Hamilton, but I am not sure if I would have tried to match length of the contract he got.