Melting Penguins Dissolve in Desert, Bow to Coyotes, 5-2

Early in his rookie season, October 24, 2006, to be exact, Evgeni Malkin scored an absolutely dazzling goal against New Jersey. One aptly described as “shades of Mario.”

Thrusting into the Devils’ zone like a dagger, Geno turned a defenseman to mush, went forehand-to-backhand while turning his entire body around and beat Hall-of-Fame goalie Martin Brodeur like Mike Lange’s rented mule.

An electric goal. A harbinger, not only of Malkin’s own Hall-of-Fame career to follow, but the Penguins’ dramatic rise from doormats to Stanley Cup champions as well.

Remember?

Last night, early in the third period of a soul-crushing 5-2 loss to the Coyotes that can best be described as an atrocity on ice, Malkin scored a goal of a decidedly different ilk.

With a delayed penalty about to be called on old friend Jason Zucker, Kris Letang wisely ragged the puck in our end to kill off a penalty to Jansen Harkins and maximize our own power play time. With a Coyote checker applying pressure, Tanger elected to drop the puck off to Malkin, who was drifting toward our untended net (Tristan Jarry had long since fled the scene). Almost casually (languidly?) Geno reached for the puck with one hand on his stick and inadvertently steered it into our net.

How the mighty have fallen.

In my season preview, I opined that the Pens could challenge for a top three spot in the Metro. Or they could be a pack team hunting for a wild card spot. Or they could dissolve through age and attrition into a bottom feeder.

As recently as a couple of weeks ago, this team reminded me in some ways of the 2015-16 Cup winners. Now I’m writing their death knell.

How quickly things can change.

The hard truth is, we stopped being legit Cup contenders several years ago. The days of wine and roses arguably came to an end when Jim Rutherford abruptly stepped down because he was denied the opportunity to make meaningful changes. Most certainly after we blew a 3-1 series lead against the Rangers in ’22, followed in short order by Ron Hextall’s rapid deconstruction of what was still a pretty good hockey club.

Last night’s loss made it official. There’s no sugar coating it. This bunch isn’t going to make the playoffs.

With virtually no margin for error following our dismal 3-6 start, we can’t afford stretches, even brief ones, where we give games (and points) away. At this stage, we’re closer to the Metro cellar than we are the division lead. Five points out of a wild-card spot and fading fast.

I feel for Sidney Crosby, whose exasperated hands-and-stick-in-the-air reaction to Malkin’s ghastly flub was as telling as Geno’s chagrined shrug of the shoulders. At age 36, our captain’s playing a brand of hockey that almost defies description. He’s literally attempting to drag us into the playoffs through sheer will and brilliance. However, Jake Guentzel and a handful of others aside, there are too many passengers on the SS Sid and not enough real help.

Speaking of reactions, how about Zucker’s emotional display following his game-opening goal? Man, do we miss his fire.

In closing, there’s a song playing in my head, kind of a soundtrack to last night’s collapse. “The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down,” by The Band.

Seems somehow fitting, doesn’t it?

The night the Penguins’ dynasty officially died.

Puckpourri

According to Natural Stat Trick, it was a fairly even game. Shots on goal (27-27), scoring chances (30-30) and high-danger chances (12-12) were deadlocked. The ‘Yotes had the upper hand in shot attempts (59-50), due in part to an aggressive forecheck that gave our defense Grave(s) difficulty.

Pun intended.

Not that Jarry was totally to blame for the loss, but Mike Sullivan’s decision to start him in the wake of the Vegas loss was a bit of a head-scratcher. Probably Sully’s way of showing faith in his goalie, but still. As Other Rick has aptly noted on more than one occasion, Alex Nedeljkovic has a winning record (8-3-2) and Jarry, as well as he’s played at times, doesn’t (12-14-4).

Sid scored at 16:30 of the second period from a sharp angle, all-too-briefly tying the game at 2-2. The Coyotes retook the lead on a goal by Alex Kerfoot 91 seconds later.

Lars Eller scored our other goal at 4:50 of the second period, thanks in no small part to an aggressive play by Pierre-Olivier Joseph, who joined the rush.

Our pop-gun power play continues to misfire (0-for-3). We’re down to a horrid 13.29 percent conversion rate, the second worst in the league.

Although his defensive play has been shaky at times, Erik Karlsson has almost quietly strung together a nine-game points streak (a goal and nine assists). The quicksilver defenseman does seem to display good chemistry with Sid. Not so with Geno.

On Deck

The Pens (21-17-6, 48 points) limp home to face the Panthers (28-14-4, 60 points) and old friend Evan Rodrigues on Friday night, then host the Canadiens (19-20-7, 45 points) on Saturday night.

To have any chance at anything, we need to win ‘em both.