Categories: PenguinPoop

Penguins Progress Reports

As a kid growing up in suburban Bethel Park, I attended Benjamin Franklin Grade School during my formative years. In addition to receiving traditional letter grades for each subject, we also received an overall quarterly assessment of our progress, which fell into one of six categories.

Generally, I was firmly ensconced in the second category…Showing Satisfactory Development. My fourth-grade teacher, a strict no-nonsense schoolmarm named Alice Foster (picture Michel Therrien in a dress) frightened me into achieving the top tier…Showing Outstanding Development.

On rare occasion, I would slip into the dreaded third category…Making Progress: Capable of Doing Better. In other words…slacker. Upon reviewing my report card, my dad would latch onto this perceived dip in progress with the voracity of a wolf clamping down on a pork chop as a means of spurring me to greater academic achievements.

Back to hockey. Rather than passing out traditional A, B, C letter grades to our Penguins, I thought I’d resurrect the old progress report categories from my youth. Purely subjective, of course.

The only player I truly wrestled with was Noel Acciari, who could’ve slotted into the Achieving to Potential category. While I have absolutely no issues with “Cookie’s” attitude or effort, I think he has a little more to give offensively.

Without further ramble, here goes:

Showing Outstanding Development (PASSING)

Crosby, Guentzel, Letang, Nedeljkovic, Pettersson

Showing Satisfactory Development (PASSING)

Eller, Jarry, Rust

Making Progress: Capable of Doing Better (PASSING)

Acciari, Graves, Joseph, Karlsson, Malkin, O’Connor, Puustinen, Rakell, Smith

Achieving to Potential (PASSING)

Carter, Harkins, Hellberg, Nieto, Ruhwedel, Shea, White

May Need to Spend More Time in Present Grade (PASSING DOUBTFUL)

Hinostroza, Ludvig, Nylander, Zohorna

Must Spend More Time in Present Grade (NOT PASSING)

Gruden, Johnstone, Koppanen

Rick Buker

View Comments

  • Hey Rick,

    Interesting, sneaky, move to try and limit controversy on grades. You left lots of wiggle room for interpretation.

    Personally, with the team actually below the mean in terms of Points, I would be hard pressed to give anyone, but Crosby and Guentzel anything resembling outstanding grades. And with Guentzel, not sure how much of his objective success is related to playing with Sid. Don't get me wrong I like Jake, but I try to be as honest as I can be, regardless of if I like a player or not.

    In the same vein, I do like Zohorna, but I think he was ruined by all of the ups and downs and lack of coaching in this organization; it may be time to cut ties with him and save the contract space.

    Also, what are your grades for the Coaches, Sullivan, Reirden, Vellucci, and Chiodo?

  • I would probably move Puustinen up a level. He's doing great for a rookie, and is definitely a major help on the powerplay. hoping he continues to see PP1 time.

    otherwise, can't complain!

    • Agreed, I have been watching his progress since he was in Liiga. I wanted him up here last season when Rust went ice cold. He has a very high hockey IQ. And although he isn't tall, he is thick. Don't mind him at all on the PP, but what they need there is a Right-Handed sniper, A net front presence, and although I do like Letang and Karlsson, I would love to see a D-man who could strike fear into defenders when he takes that point shot.

      Josh Yohe had an interesting report a couple of days ago, detailing Sullivan's dislike of Karlsson on the PP.

Recent Posts

Penguins Use Puck Luck to Pluck Ducks, 2-1

Well, our Penguins finally did it! They played a reasonably complete 60-minute game (62:35 actually)…

18 hours ago

Ex-Penguins Update: Halloween Special

I thought I'd take a break from the relentlessly grim news surrounding our skidding Penguins…

2 days ago

Dubas’ Trade Strategy: Out with the Old, In with the New

  The Penguins are off to a rough start, to say the least. Over their…

2 days ago

Penguins Lose Again, Time to Say Goodbye

Perhaps the title of this article should be, “The More Things Change, the More They…

3 days ago

Fragile Penguins Buckle Again, Bow to Canucks 4-3

Before I spout my two cents worth over last night's come-from-in-front loss to the Canucks,…

6 days ago

The Soul of the Penguins Died Vs Vancouver

Last night's game was hard to watch. The Penguins' usual problems were on full display:…

6 days ago