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Gameday Poop: The Pittsburgh Penguins vs The Philadelphia Cryers – Game 5

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ByPhil Krundle

Apr 23, 2009

This is hard hitting NHL hockey, not a Philadelphia ballet class. Look in the dictionary under the word ‘Whiner’ and you will see the 2008/2009 Philadelphia team photo. These guys are all talk. When they lose they are all meow meow meow Crosby was playing hockey and put the goal in our net meow meow meow. I’m thinking that since the classless Philadelphia fans boo their own players, the ‘Crosby Sucks’ chant is probably a huge Philadelphia compliment.

Here’s what the head crybaby – Philadelphia Cryers coach John ‘Cryer’ Stevens said about Crosby’s goal: “We didn’t put the puck at our feet and throw ourselves in the net, which obviously is allowed now” No, you didn’t but your sure did try to the whole game. “He knocks Marty into the net, that was my concern, the goalie has to be allowed to make a save.” John ‘Cryer’ Stevens said.

The Flyer whining about how the NHL hates them and loves the other teams media machine is in full effect:

How about Simon ‘Boo Hoo’ Gagne: “If that’s Scott Hartnell doing that, I’m not sure if that’s a goal. But it’s Sidney Crosby.” ‘Boo Hoo’ Gagne again: “I’ve always felt that we need to beat the other team, and we need to beat pretty much everything. We’re not going to get any calls from anybody.” The Flyers had twice the power play time as the Penguins this game. These guys have the nerve to call Sidney Crosby a baby.

The overlords of the NHL obviously tried to give the Flyers Cryers the game by putting them on the power play for over 1/5 of the game. The refs definitely did not call the same calls on both ends of the ice. Why are they doing this you ask? So that they can get their precious Saturday NBC time slot filled with the teams that gave them their highest rating since the “Winter Classic”

By the way, It’s ‘White Out’ Thursday, so wear your white Pittsburgh Penguin jersey unless you want to wear the Charlie the Tuna t-shirts that they’ll be handing out at the door.   O.K. now that I’m on the subject, the Flyers are the ones wearing white on Thursday shouldn’t it be a blackout?

Quickie:   Last year the Penguins beat the Flyers 6-0 in the fifth game to win the series 4-1.

On the Farm. The WBS Penguins have taken a 3-1 lead in their playoff series by beating the   Bridgeport Sound Tigers last night 2-1 . Jeff Taffe got the game winning goal.

Sports Illustrated has a page with NHL player/celebrity look-a-likes. I took time out of my day to link the Penguin ones  and one special one so that you can  just click on the players name below to see their pictures.

Evgeni Malkin – Sylvester Stallone
Sidney Crosby – Andy Samberg  (Saturday Night Live comedian)
Sergei Gonchar – David Hyde Pierce (TV show Frasier’s little brother)
Marc-Andre Fleury – Apolo Anton Ohno – who? (speed skater)

I can’t make this stuff up… Sports Illustrated said that Washington Capital Alexander Ovechkin’s look-a-like is that it’s the guy who had the nail stuck in his head in Happy Gilmore!
Alex Ovechkin – Richard Kiel (Mr. Larson in Happy Gilmore)

Alright I have time for one more cry baby Flyers Cryers quote. Coach John ‘Cryer’ Stevens: “He carried himself, the puck and Marty into the net. The official didn’t want to talk to us. There is a series supervisor and I will talk to him before the next game to get some sort of explanation.”  I’m calling my mommy.  Waaaaaah! Put a diaper on him.  Ah yes, the Philadelphia Cryers.

…and one more Celebrity look-a-like:

 Gametime is 7pm and can be seen in high definition at the igloo or on FSN.

11 thoughts on “Gameday Poop: The Pittsburgh Penguins vs The Philadelphia Cryers – Game 5”
  1. I’ve only seen savran smelling the hockey stick. I’m with Krundle – sorry. but i miss half the games because i’m there – speaking of that I gotta run….LET’S GO PENS!!!!

  2. It’s positively Dan Potash. As long as you three thinking it’s Savern aren’t refs tonight—- all is well.

    Go Pens!

  3. For what it’s worth, the only sniffer commercial I’ve seen is the one with Savran sniffing a hockey stick.

    Maybe there’s more than one!

    I’m on my way to the game, we’ll the pub then the game… and I can’t sing.

    Satan 2 goals tonight!

    GO HOME FLYERS!!!
    LET’S GO PENS!!!

  4. Just in case anyone needed it… the lyrics to God Bless America –
    Everyone some be signing it while the shake hands tonight at the Igloo, in your car, at home, even if you are sniffing tape——->

    God bless America,
    Land that I love,
    Stand beside her and guide her
    Thru the night with a light from above;

    From the mountains, to the prairies,
    To the oceans white with foam,
    God bless America,
    My home, sweet home.
    God bless America,
    My home, sweet home.

  5. Thanks for the ‘plug’ Hook – but I read it somewhere. No scoop. As to the sniffer being Savern (it was Potash) – The dead giveaway is that Savern needs an oxygen mask to sniff! Boom -Boom -Boom
    As to Satan replacing Sykora – If Sykora isn’t hurt he’ll be playing somewhere else next season. What a story if Satan lights it up, eh?

  6. Satan in for Sykora – well he can’t do worse. I’ve only seen the savran smell test commercial personally.

  7. Boombastic should get the SCOOP OF the DAY calling this one in advance. Both Satan and Boucher.

    Also it is rumored that (FSN) Dan Potash re-sniffed that tape from Sykora’s stick from the Detroit OT game and it now smells like tuna.

    Krundle claims it is Stan Savern who sniffed Sykora’s tape??? I’ve got 2 DOS EQUIS XX drafts on this one. Anyone else recall who sniffs it? (the hockey tape)

  8. The Penguins just announced that Miroslav Satan will be playing tonight instead of Petr Sykora and that Philip Boucher might be playing for Christopher Letang.

  9. Jon Cryer – Stevens does look like him but mostly whines like him! He could be Alan Harper’s stand-in with no rehearsal!
    Flyers problem is that every line has “Two and a Half Men” Boom – Boom -Boom

    Let’s Go Pens!

  10. Wow, crosby looks exactly like Samberg – that is strange. I think we all start the Bull $#!& cheer tonight if the refs try to pull the same crap they pulled on Tuesday. That will make for some good TV on Versus.

  11. John Stevens said that the Flyer fans are “more Passionate” than other fans. Is that his nice way of saying that he’s tired of them booing him and his team off of the ice all of the time. The whole Flyer organization and the fans are all classless. I don’t need to prove anything as a Penguin fan.

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