Penguins Surprises: Who’da Thunk It?

As the Grateful Dead sang in their 1970 classic, Truckin’, “what a long, strange trip it’s been.” Yes, I’m referring to the Penguins’ Cinderella season.

Back when training camp assembled last September, who’da thunk (in no particular order):

• Anthony Mantha, coming off a season lost to ACL surgery at age 31, would register career highs in goals (31), assists (30) and points (61);
• Fellow free-agent Justin Brazeau would establish career highs in goals (17), assists (17) and points (34);
• Scrappy fourth-liner Connor Dewar would register career highs in goals (14), assists (16) and points (30);
• Erik Karlsson would rediscover his three-time Norris Trophy winning form while earning team MVP honors;
• Obscure free-agent Parker Wotherspoon would serve as the perfect partner for EK65, freeing the silky Swede to play his masterful, free-flowing game while adding gristle to the blueline corps;
• Evgeni Malkin would turn back time at age 39 and return to his old, galloping self while averaging better than a point per game, while playing wing to boot;
• Rickard Rakell would switch from wing to center and thrive to the tune of 11 goals over a crucial 10-game stretch;
• Egor Chinakhov would arrive in a mid-season deal with the CBJ for the proverbial bag of used pucks and instantly emerge as a sensational, net-filling, star-in-the-making;
• First-round pick Ben Kindel would play his way into a prominent role as a-mature-beyond-his-years, 18-year-old rookie;
• Journeyman Ryan Shea (seven points in 70 career games) would tally six goals and 31 points while blossoming into a steady, surprisingly mobile two-way defenseman;
• Kris Letang and Sam Girard would jell as a puck-moving, second defensive pairing following a rocky start;
• With plenty of shot-blocking miles on his chassis, 34-year-old Noel Acciari would rebound to score 12 goals after combining for nine the previous two seasons;
• A dozen players would tally double-figures in goals, including four 20+ goal scorers;
• We’d score four or more non-shootout goals in a game 42 times, five or more 23 times;
• Sidney Crosby would register his NHL record 21st season of point-per-game production (okay, not a surprise);
• The team would go 5-4-3 without Sid and 9-10-4 without Blake Lizotte;
• Sid would not earn team MVP honors, an award he’s garnered 13 times;
• Bryan Rust would play gritty, inspired hockey and top the 60-point mark for the second season in a row (not a surprise, Part 2);
• Kyle Dubas and his staff would score a bullseye on virtually every addition, including hulking trade deadline acquisition Elmer Söderblom;
• Dubas would find a taker for Tristan Jarry;
• The PPG Paints partisans would take a shine to Stuart Skinner (Stuuuuuu);
• Rookie coach Dan Muse would serve as the Pens’…uh…muse;
• We’d evolve into a spirited, heart ‘n’ soul, never-say-die-team;
• We’d go 3-10 in shootouts;
• We’d be on the verge of clinching our first playoff berth since 2022 in an insanely competitive Eastern Conference.

Certainly not I.